I started in paint. I was looking for a waterbased spray sealer. You'd think that would be with paint. I read 8,000 cans, all of whose labels have about 10000 squillion words on them relating to the specific type of brain cancer I'm going to get should I pop the lid off. But not a peep about whether they are water or solvent based. I asked someone. It was as if I were speaking in tongues. He told me I'd better go to the tile department, which actually made me laugh. However, I needed tile anyway, so off I went to meet completely befuddled and confused Lowe's employee #2, who I'm fairly certain did not even know where he was, much less what a water based sealer might look like. He pointed me to the grout section, which I'm pretty sure was the best guess he had.
I'm annoyed. I go back to paint and just grab something I will test. I get the other things on my list and head to SELF CHECKOUT where the trip spiraled into madness.
I start ringing up my items and a third employee who REEKED of cigarette smoke, came over and croaked in a Throw Momma From the Train voice that it would be faster if she "helped" me. Have I really misunderstood self-checkout all this time? Silly me, thinking this was the one last place in retail where no one would bother me. She gets a little scanner gun, and proceeds to stand way too close to me and smell while ringing up my items EXCRUCIATINGLY slowly, and not bagging any of them. A full FIFTEEN minutes later, she is finally finished ruining my independence. I thought I was going to have a stroke and have to be buried in a large Rubbermaid container from aisle 11.
Is it too much to ask for retailers to put computers in their stores for us to Google our products on and find them and buy them without dying of second hand smoke or having someone's nose in our brain? I think not.
Anyway, I survived and I have an AMAZING project to show you as a result, but not today! You will have to wait. Now, I have new catalog goodies to show you - specifically - OWL!
I was so excited to have the new owl punch in my hand that I made a card specifically to celebrate OWL and nothing else! :) I used the new Love Letter DSP, the Owl Punch, the banner from Party This Way, Rough Type, the new rhinestones and the new lace trim. The background is Sweetheart DSP.
I LOVE the OWL PUNCH!! He's so cute! All those little pieces get punched out as well as two little dots for the eyes, but I subbed the new rhinestones, which are the sparkliest rhinestones I've ever used - and I've used billions! They are like little crystals!! I'm so stoked about all the new stuff I can't even stand it. More to come!
SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I only hope my OWL card is half this cute!
ReplyDeleteWV: aeddlet
I think I would have been aeddlet with all that "help" from scary Lowe's employees.
Sooo cute, Lydia!! I almost ordered that punch. Errrr!
ReplyDeletevery funny story... very cute card!
ReplyDelete~Kendra
EEK!! I LOVE HIM!!! (and I don't even like birds!)
ReplyDeleteOMGoodness, this just cracks me up. I think this kind of thing happens to me every time I go to Lowe's or Home Depot. LOL
ReplyDeleteGREAT card, can't wait to see your other creation
That card is totally worth the pain that you went through to punch the little owl! Very, super...no, wait....UBERCUTE! Yes, you have officially won the title of UBERCUTE! card. (you have to include the exclamation point)
ReplyDeleteI can't believe you didn't whip out your magic phone and search for your sealant right there. Your brain must have been suffering from standing too close to the toxic sealant products.
WV: belost (almost too easy today)
Usage: I would belost without seeing Lydia's UBERCUTE! creations every day.
Haha, have you been shopping at my local home improvement center?
ReplyDeleteAt least you weren't behind the lady who KNEW her card could not be declined since she just paid $2,000 on it yesterday, so could she just go ahead and talk to the credit card company on the phone herself? Honey, I think the credit card gods are trying to tell you that you do not need one shiny gold ceramic starfish to hang on your wall, much less three of them.
In other comment news, LOVE the card! I bet Mr Owlie is so excited that you made a banner just for him. And L-O-V-E that dp! Can't wait until it's in my hands!
Are you sure you weren't in Walmart? Cute card. I really do not want to like that owl punch - too many itsy bitsy pieces.
ReplyDeleteI love your stories, they always put a smile on my face whether you intend it or not LOL
ReplyDeleteAnd your card ROCKS!!
Love the owl. And the story is a riot, almost as great as the card!
ReplyDeleteG.
WAHAHAHAHAHa! They must train 'em that way - that Stupid Look is universal. at least at Home Depot you have to hunt 'em up to get The Look, because they realize that the customers would rather be left alone, and they go slinking away whenever they see someone who might need help. WV "strica" At Lowe's they have strica customer service policies
ReplyDeleteOMGosh! I wondered how long it would take you to get that owl punch! LOL. It is on my wish list as well! Love the card, it is soooo cute!!!!!
ReplyDeleteHugs,
Lisa Atha
P.S. I was LOL the whole time I read that shopping story, hilarious.
Oh my, what a gold mine I've discovered in your blog! wonderful and hilarious as well! We've all been there! My son is moving to Austin for a year soon, as a vicar. I wish he had time to be your understudy as well for that year! LOL! Keep up the great work!
ReplyDeleteThis is why I'm always so dang SURPRISED when I find an employee who knows what I'm talkin' 'bout and where to find it and ... etc. Such joy!
ReplyDeleteJust found your blog from roaming around SCS. Can't wait to check it out further. Love your style1
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