Friday, June 22, 2018

The Only Legitimate Reason

So twice in my life now, I've gone to get my oil changed, and the dingleberries doing the work have for an inexplicable reason, turned my headlights from auto to ON. Since I don't drive at night very often, I did not notice that my headlights were on, thusly killing my battery overnight.

Now, in my opinion, there is only one legitimate reason for ever wanting manual control of your headlights.

you are trying to hide a body at night, in the woods

Otherwise - auto takes care of all your needs. So why do we still have this setting? And, more importantly - WHY ARE ALL MY MECHANICS CLEARLY STASHING BODIES IN THE WOODS ALL THE TIME?

Only body stashers ever touch their headlight controls, trust me.

So consider this an open letter to all car manufacturers. Quit it. You're just getting people murdered.

You know who I'm pretty sure never needed to stash a body in the woods? Frida Kahlo. Although she WAS a suspect in Trotsky's murder - true story. Artists are complicated people.

Did you know that her childhood home was the "blue house?" La Casa Azul. Fact.

At my retreat, I taught a fun foil tape transfer technique that is super easy, and the image I chose for the sample was a royalty-free image of Frida. (This is a fun source of royalty-free images you can use. I also like this site.) It would also be fun to make cards with a laser print of a personal photo - think personalized invitations, etc.

The sentiment is from Concord & 9th and is one of my faves. The embellishments are little iridescent hole-less flat sequins.
Frida Card by Understand Blue - Foil Tape Transfer
Fill-In Phrases BUNDLE
[ C&9 ]
Aluminum Foil Tape- best for HVAC,...
[ AMZUS ]
Amazon.com: Copper Foil Tape with...
[ AMZUS ]
Aurora Lights | Confetti Mix - Honey...
[ HNB ]
Ranger .5 Oz. MINI MULTI MEDIUM MATTE...
[ SSS | MFT | ART ]
Marvy Uchida JEWEL PICKER Tool 91GRC
[ SSS | MFT ]
Tsukineko VersaFine Clair NOCTURNE...
[ SSS ]
Tsukineko VersaFine Clair NOCTURNE...
[ SSS ]
MISTI Stamping Tool
[ MSW | HA | SSS | ELH | SBC | MFT ]
Absorber - Synthetic Cleaning Cloth
[ AMZUS ]
Rotatrim Professional Series Cutter -...
[ BLIC ]
Mudder 10 Pack White Buffer Sanding...
[ AMZUS ]
Xyron ADHESIVE ERASER 23675
[ SSS | ART | AMZUS ]
Essentials by Ellen Storage...
[ ELH ]
Teflon Bone Folder - Ellen Hutson LLC
[ ELH | SSS ]
Heavy Base Weight Card Stock- White
[ GNK ]
Tombow MONO MULTI Liquid Glue Two...
[ SSS | ART | BLIC | ELH ]
Ink Off Cloth
[ INK ]
Ritual | Essential for Women | A...
[ RTL ]

Now speaking of making all the things better, I have a fun new find to share with you today. This comes from my favorite podcast - The Vanished. She had an ad on a few weeks ago about a vitamin that lists the source of every single ingredient on their website! I could not get there fast enough.

If you have been a reader of mine, you know I'm an absolute evangelist about food labeling - and vitamins are extremely tricky both for pets and humans. After my cat was killed by the Iams pet food contamination with ground up melamine from China (they found that melamine looks like protein on chemical tests, so they decided to grind up garbage to cheat the test and put it in cat food AND baby formula) - I became obsessed with where every ingredient of everything that comes into this house comes from. And many, many human and pet vitamins are sourced in China. Vet after vet and my doctor told me it was IMPOSSIBLE to find a non-Chinese vitamin. I don't do well with impossibilities, so I kept looking.

These vitamins I heard about on the podcast are not Chinese. They list the source of every single one of their ingredients, and none are from China. They're cool looking too - they explain why they are clear on the website here.

Ritual Vitamins for Women by Understand Blue

Their capsules are vegan and non-GMO (I try not to ever eat anything with gelatin in it - make a homemade gel printing plate and you'll quickly find out why :) #smellslikedeath), and the ingredients are all bio-available. I have never been able to take any vitamins with iron in them, because they give me a stomach ache, and these do NOT because they use a different form.

So I thought I'd share these miraculous vitamins with you. I'm always willing to try something new when I hear an ad, but it doesn't always work out as well as this did - you win some, you lose some!

I also wanted to share a recipe with you. I made this quick cucumber salad (more like a quick pickling process) for Father's Day and we all loved it. It's definitely cucumber season here, so I am always looking for new salads for my favorite veggie and this is divine. All cold food welcome here in the summer. This recipe is modified from this one.

Ingredients

4 English cucumbers, peeled and thinly sliced
1 red onion, thinly sliced (don’t use a different onion or God will smite you)
2 cups distilled white vinegar
1 cup water
1 cup granulated sugar
4 tablespoons fresh dill, minced (dried dill will most definitely not be ideal)

Instructions

Season cucumbers with salt in a large bowl and let sweat 1 hour - don’t skip this - I actually sweated the onions and the cucumbers together because I didn’t read. Works fine :). Drain liquids and toss cucumbers with onion slices.

In a small saucepan over high heat, pour in white vinegar and water and stir in sugar until dissolved and liquid turns clear, 3 to 5 minutes.

Pour over cucumbers and onions (yes, while it’s hot). Stir in dill. Cover with a tight fitting lid and refrigerate 1 hour. Serve cold or at room temperature.
It's really easy and I highly recommend it if you're bringing a dish to a party. It makes a lot of brine, but that's just so that the cucumber soaks in it, so I wouldn't recommend cutting it down. I just used the white vinegar that I clean my veggies with.
So here's the video for the foil tape transfer technique - it's quick and easy - and you just need a laser printed image for it to work.



You DO make all the things better. :)

Loveyameanitdonthideabodyinthewoodsbye.

Wednesday, June 20, 2018

From Here to New York

I vividly remember the first time I ever saw counterfeit merchandise, because it ended with a car accident and an arrest.

I was in Manhattan for the weekend in college - I went to college upstate and frequently visited New York - I'm still amazed I didn't get murdered - and I was just wandering around Times Square, window shopping and eating hot dogs from carts.

I walked up to a street vendor who was selling purses, and I was shocked by how cheap they were - they were Louis Vuitton, Chanel, etc., but they were all $5-$10. As what was happening started to dawn on me, all of the sudden there was a loud crash, as a taxi smashed into the vendor's serial killer van, which was parked on the curb next to where he was selling these fake purses.

(The yellow ones don't stop, you know.)

I walked past the front of the van to see how bad the damage was, and the taxi had peeled back most of the metal covering the side of the van - from the back bumper to the driver door.

Even more astonishing than that was the fact that between the inside of the van and the outside of the van was a bunch of STUFF. The entire side of the van was stuffed with bags of something - probably drugs or cash or God knows what - and it was now exposed. As it started to dawn on me that this was not a good situation for anyone nearby - I saw that the vendor had already thrown all of his purses into the back of the van, and he ran past me to get into the driver's seat - and pealed out to get out of Dodge before the police arrived.

It was quite an education in the space of about five minutes. That's all the time you'll get to learn anything in New York.

I've always been in the "if it's too good to be true" category, and suspicious of things that are too cheap.

When you come across something in a category where everything else is $25, and the thing you're looking at is $5, I can guarantee you that thing is stolen.

And a lot of really bad things happened leading up to that stolen property being for sale, so it's best not to be a part of it.

Just eat your hot dog and go back to school. Preferably without getting murdered or run over by a taxi.

I am doing the tutorial at Splitcoast today! Just in case I haven't said it in a while - we send out a newsletter every week - it has a free tutorial with a video, it has a summary of that week's challenges, hot topics from the forums, and crafty coupons, etc. You should subscribe, which you can do on our home page.

So today I have my Gel Impressionism technique featured. This is a fun, two minute process to get impressionistic images with Distress Oxides and your Gel Press. I used my 3x5 Gel Press, as I did in the original video, and for the both samples, I used this gorgeous Sketchy Cities skyline. The sentiment for this card is from the same set, stamped in Nocturne. The image is stamped onto the wet Distress Oxides (misted with alcohol to activate) with Pinecone ink. I had the Gel Press set up in my MISTI and I just printed it as if I were stamping with it onto white cardstock.

Because you are using alcohol and not water, plain cardstock is fine for this technique.
Gel Impressionism card - blue - by Understand Blue


















Sketchy Cities America Stamp Set
[ ALTN | SSS ]
Gel Press 3 x 5 REUSABLE GEL PRINTING...
[ SSS ]
Tim Holtz Distress Oxide Ink Pad...
[ SSS | CRF | JGG | SBC | CST ]
Tim Holtz Distress Oxide Ink Pad...
[ SSS | JGG | CRF | SBC ]
Tim Holtz Distress Oxide Ink Pad...
[ SSS | JGG | SBC | CRF ]
Tim Holtz Distress Oxide Ink Pad ICED...
[ SSS | CRF | JGG | SBC | MFT | ART ]
Tsukineko VersaFine Clair NOCTURNE...
[ SSS ]
Tsukineko VersaFine Clair PINECONE...
[ SSS | CST ]
Tsukineko VersaFine Clair NOCTURNE...
[ SSS ]
Heavy Base Weight Card Stock- White
[ GNK ]
MDS098012 Isopropyl Alcohol, 91%, 16...
[ AMZUS ]
Hero Arts Water MIST SPRAY BOTTLE...
[ SSS ]
MISTI Stamping Tool
[ MSW | SSS | ELH | MFT | SBC ]
Absorber - Synthetic Cleaning Cloth
[ AMZUS ]
Purell Advanced Hand Sanitizer...
[ AMZUS ]
Rotatrim Professional Series Cutter -...
[ BLIC ]
Mudder 10 Pack White Buffer Sanding...
[ AMZUS ]
Xyron ADHESIVE ERASER 23675
[ SSS | ART | AMZUS ]
Essentials by Ellen Storage...
[ ELH ]
Teflon Bone Folder - Ellen Hutson LLC
[ ELH | SSS ]
Tombow MONO MULTI Liquid Glue Two...
[ SSS | ART | BLIC | ELH ]
Ink Off Cloth
[ INK ]

For the second sample, I used the same skyline - but I didn't press hard enough, so there is a little gap that makes it look like there are two little peninsulas - I just went with it!

That beautiful die is this one from Concord & 9th - and yes, that's the glitter paper I've been raving about. I rubbed it on a black shirt and no glitter came off, so I have added it as a permanent fixture in my arsenal. I moved the stamp up a bit on the plate so that the bottom section of ink looked like water.
Gel Impressionism card - dawn - by Understand Blue


















Shine On BUNDLE - Concord & 9th
[ C&9 | SSS ]
Sketchy Cities America Stamp Set
[ ALTN | SSS ]
Gel Press 3 x 5 REUSABLE GEL PRINTING...
[ SSS ]
Neutrals Glitter Paper Pack - Concord...
[ C&9 | SSS ]
Tim Holtz Distress Oxide Ink Pad...
[ SSS | CRF | MFT ]
Tim Holtz Distress Oxide Ink Pad...
[ SSS | JGG | CRF | MFT | ART ]
Tim Holtz Distress Oxide Ink Pad ICED...
[ SSS | JGG | MFT | ART ]
Tsukineko VersaFine Clair NOCTURNE...
[ SSS ]
Tsukineko VersaFine Clair PINECONE...
[ SSS | CST ]
Tsukineko VersaFine Clair NOCTURNE...
[ SSS ]
Heavy Base Weight Card Stock- White
[ GNK ]
Hero Arts Water MIST SPRAY BOTTLE...
[ SSS ]
MDS098012 Isopropyl Alcohol, 91%, 16...
[ AMZUS ]
MISTI Stamping Tool
[ MSW | SSS | ELH | MFT | SBC ]
Absorber - Synthetic Cleaning Cloth
[ AMZUS ]
Purell Advanced Hand Sanitizer...
[ AMZUS ]
Rotatrim Professional Series Cutter -...
[ BLIC ]
Mudder 10 Pack White Buffer Sanding...
[ AMZUS ]
Xyron ADHESIVE ERASER 23675
[ SSS | ART | AMZUS ]
Essentials by Ellen Storage...
[ ELH ]
Teflon Bone Folder - Ellen Hutson LLC
[ ELH | SSS ]
Tombow MONO MULTI Liquid Glue Two...
[ SSS | ART | BLIC | ELH ]
Ink Off Cloth
[ INK ]
Sizzix BIG SHOT EXPRESS Gray and...
[ SSS | CST | ART ]

Even if New York isn't within driving distance anymore, at least it's still in my craft room. Along with zero counterfeit products, I'm happy to say. 

And I rarely have to worry about getting run over by one of the yellow ones.

Head over to Splitcoast to watch the video and see what we are up to this week!

Also - my winner for my Altenew giveaway is Debra Rumpaza - congratulations! I will contact you with instructions!

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