Really, it's not. It's about the newest item for the Blue List! I'm so excited! I went to the store, which wasn't really thrilling me after three nights of raging insomnia. However, I wanted something good to eat and I thought I would get a box of GardenBurgers, a veggie burger that I really enjoy. It doesn't try to taste like beef, which I appreciate in a vegetable! :)
However, they didn't have any of the actual Garden Burger brand at Randall's, which made me exhale loudly and repeatedly through my nose like an angry cat. No one really cared, in case you were wondering.
However, since I was already there staring at the other vegetarian products, I started examining the Morningstar Farms products and found three fascinating things: Artichoke bites, broccoli cheese bites and Chik'n patties. They looked so tasty on the box with their crunchy breading (I'm SUCH a marketer's dream) that I bought all three.
Now, let me tell you in case you've forgotten my bone-in filet fetish - I AM NOT A VEGETARIAN. I'm not a health nut by any stretch. However, I don't really eat a ton of protein in general unless it's really good, and I have some rules for my food.
1) It can't come from China. Those of us who have pets who ate pet food last year and got sick pretty much know how that ends.
2) The ingredients can't start with "mechanically separated (fill in the animal blank here)
3) The label can't include the word "parts", "lips" (check the Slim Jim label - I'm not making this up) or "meat products" - it's either meat, or it's a product, not both.
4) I prefer food that comes from America, England or, really, from about 500 miles from my house. Not being elitist, just really trying not to die or accidentally eat GHB.
5) ABSOLUTELY no fake dairy products or sweeteners. I don't like plastic cheese, fake butter and I'm allergic to Phenylalinine, which, once you say it out loud, kind of takes its appeal away. Guess that's why they call it Equal. In general, I think it's best not to eat things that end in "-anine", wouldn't you say? God didn't go to all the trouble to make sugar cane and bees for us to eat something produced in a lab.
6) It really needs to taste good.
All that to say I would never eat a real, mechanically separated chicken patty like they have at Burger King - BLECH. But I thought I wouldn't mind a vegetarian version given how lovely it looked on the box.
OOOOOHHH MYYY WAS THAT A GREAT CHOICE!!!
Not only did this thing have the most marvelous, crunchy, fried feeling crust, but it tasted like a yummy piece of chicken!! I was enthralled!!! I made myself a bagel sandwich with it - mayo, melted havarti - oh freaking my.

The best part? 140 calories, 9 grams of protein, 5 grams of fat. Not bad for something that really felt like a comfort food.
So if you're open minded enough for a meatless entree - give this a shot. I got the plain kind - they have flavored ones too. I'm going to try a parmagiana with it next.
Spectacular.
Tired tonight, so no card. Did I mention the insomnia? About to start hallucinating. I'm sure the chicken will give me peaceful dreams.
Hope you're having a good night!
:)
Me.