Or their shirts, for that matter.
I am always astonished at the number of people who go outside virtually nekkid to walk or run. It's pretty disturbing.
Here are my tips for my neighbors.
- No matter how great you think you look, a nekkid sweaty neighbor with their sweaty bits violently bouncing around in plain view is pretty unappetizing at any time of day.
- You don't look that great.
- Do you realize you're actually outside your house right now? Because you are. Outside. In public. Nekkid. Sweaty. Bouncing.
- A heart rate monitor is not a shirt in the classical sense. Plus, boys, it really makes you look like you're wearing a bra. Perhaps not the impression you were going for?
- Likewise, ladies, a sports bra is not a shirt. I don't care how big a Madonna fan you are, put a shirt on. They design home treadmills for people who want to get their Madonna on. I suggest you buy one on Amazon. Soon. Don't even wait for a sale.
- It's not that hot out. Actually, it's never that hot out. Anywhere. In the world. Ever.
- You look greasy. Should you be deranged enough to think that this is some sort of dating technique, I can assure you no man/woman/dog is ever going to want to touch you who has witnessed this spectacle. I promise you everyone is imagining how a person that sweaty must smell and then hurriedly crossing over to the other side of the street. Ask me how I know.
We actually have a semi-famous walker in our neighborhood who chooses to walk in long pants and a golf shirt (despite the triple digit heat) but tucks his shirt up under his armpits so that his belly is exposed. It's quite something.
I pondered all this in a mental tangent after I saw Bridget Finlay's AWESOME Hope You Can Cling To challenge, which is to make a card with something you see when you look up.
You'll be relieved to know that I did not choose a sweaty neighbor as my subject! :) Instead, I used some REAL inspiration that we got on Saturday - RAIN!! And not just a little rain either. A steady downpour that added up to four or five desperately needed inches in a few spots.
Jeanne and Anna and Joan and Holly and all the fun girlies at the swap and Salado is such a fun town. Here's the little theater across from where we ate Saturday night - there was some sort of Patsy Cline show happening. This was right before the rain came in.
So I got all snug in my quaint room at the B&B to listen to the rain and colored this image for Bridget's challenge. So sweet. See the glittery raindrops?
Stamps: Lean on Me Ink: Memento Paper: Whisper White, Crumb Cake, Real Red Accessories: ShinHan Touch Twin Markers: R4, R14 R139, R131, YR33, Y35, Y38, YR142, BR103, PB74, PB183, Corner Rounder, Embossing Folder, Dazzling Details (raindrops)
So are you playing along in these challenges yet? We have more than $7500 in prizes to give away!
Yes, I said $7500 in prizes!
What are you waiting for? Head over to the Hope You Can Cling To Challenge Forum and make a card!