Why I'm Not an Engineer, For Starters

I know some of you are already laughing, because you've never imagined that I COULD have been an engineer in the first place.

But the why is important sometimes.

I had this revelation on Thursday. Well, I mean revelation in the sense that I'd already set aside the fact that differential equations and imaginary numbers are stupid and that my favorite classes were genetics, Russian literature and art, but still - a revelation in spite of that.

I was taking the new - insert shudder here - flyover that has recently been built near my home on a major highway.

Said flyover is like 40 billion feet in the air and banked like the F1 track.

There's really no amount of convenience that makes any of that okay, but nonetheless, I take it sometimes in weak moments.

And EVERY TIME I do, the same thing happens.

I get a prickly sensation on the top of my forearms. My hands sweat. My heart races. I grip the steering wheel like it's the last donut at a cop convention. I have extremely vivid visions of shooting off and falling to my untimely and undignified death on the road below - also known as - the road SMART, NON-ENGINEER TYPES TAKE, BECAUSE IT'S WHERE ROADS BELONG - ON THE GROUND.

That's when I really knew why engineering was never in the stars for me.

Not ONE single time, in my, er, 29 years on the planet, have I EVER believed I was not going to die on one of those things. I envision the pylons crumbling, the edges falling off, the whole thing swaying like a jump rope before turning into dust - every, single, time.

I don't believe in engineering.

My amygdala doesn't believe in engineering.

My amygdala wants to be on the ground.

I can't help it if some people believe in suspension bridges like other people believe in honest politicians and unicorns. I can see no difference in value judgement that I can make here. They're both crazier than carnies on meth and cotton candy and ain't nobody got time for that.

Back on terra firma, I celebrated a momentous day on Saturday - the day that Whataburger finally started selling their ketchup in the grocery store. For those of you not in Texas, you're in our prayers. It's sad that you've never had Whataburger ketchup and can't comprehend the glory of this day. A moment of silence please.

I actually took an email holiday for Memorial Day and it was really nice. I went outside and stuff :).

Look at my butterfly bush. I did.

And look at this sassy and adorable something or other hanging out on my cucumber plant!

Tomorrow I have more pics of other sassy ant looking thingies that were on there today.

I actually did very little crafting this weekend, because an unexpected event you'll learn about tomorrow intervened. But before all that happened, I did make my hostess sample for this week's Mix-Ability challenge on Splitcoast.

This is part two of my Yin / Yang challenge. This time we had to use a bumpy and a smooth texture on our project. Now, I made the challenge up, but that doesn't mean it didn't take a little thought! But in the end, I thought that the place where you always feel this contrast is at the beach - with smooth shells in rough sand, so that's what I did. I used glitter for my rough texture, and Crystal effects for my smooth texture. And hey - did you notice? They totally listened to me and didn't retire this beautiful set :) The background was made by masking the shell and sponging Pool Party through drywall tape.

Look how I captured one tiny glint of light on the glitter - what a huge accomplishment!

Anyhoo - please drive carefully - people who believe in imaginary numbers put up those bridges you commute over. And I don't trust them as far as I can throw them.

Loveyameanitbye.