Monday, August 13, 2012

When You Are Allowed to Use The Word "Real"

I saw something very disturbing yesterday when I was grocery shopping. Well, actually, I saw lots of disturbing things - like the guy crawling all up in my business in line, as per usual. I also saw a child having a fit that was like something out of Alien. Actually, I'm nearly positive the child was inhabited by another life form.

Anyway, this next thing was MORE disturbing.

I saw a product which boasted "Made with REAL cream" on its label.

Let me tell you people something.

Cream is a word. It means something. It does not require the use of the word "real" as a qualifier, if that is, in fact, what you are using in your product.

As a matter of fact, we should not allow the use of the word "cream" if the actual ingredient is made out of coconut oil and partially hydrogenated extract of donkey tail.

Some other things that should never require the use of the word "real" include:

Cheese - If it's vegetable oil dyed orange, injected with plastic and formed into a rectangle, it's not cheese.
Butter - This is the definition of a holy food. Don't use the word if you don't mean it.
Fruit - What in the world drives people to qualify FRUIT? It's either fruit or it's not.

I suggest that the makers of fake products come up with their own words for their fake products, like the people who make KRAB. KRAB is not the same as crab, which is real. So maybe if you're making something other than cheese, instead of cheese makers having to describe their product as "real", you have to call your product. CHIZE. Fake donkey tail butter could be called "GROSS" and fake fruit could be called FROUTH.

I'm sure we could come up with something.

I'd be ever so grateful.

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Paper: Whisper White
Ink: Melon Mambo, Basic Grey, Peach Parfait, Tangerine Tango
Accessories: Framelits - Labels Collection, Daffodil Delight Striped Ribbon, Fancy Fan embossing folder
Techniques: Dry Embossing

I made this pretty card for Joanne Basile's Dare to Get Dirty Challenge on Splitcoast and I LOVE it - I LOVE this stamp set! Look how pretty the grey is as the dark note on my Melon Mambo flower? SQUEE! Nothing fake about that!!

Now that we have sorted all that "real" nonsense out, here's a little stop motion video I made of my walk, for all my friends who always say they want to walk with me. :) Enjoy.


  1. It's late and I'm feeling lazy so I'm leaving one comment on two posts.
    I don't know what other Europeans call snausage fingers - heck, I've never even got as far as thinking what I would call them if I had to describe them. But now that I have learned the word snausage, it's pretty perfect!!
    Amen to butter being the holy food!! I'm embarrassed at how much we use, but why buy hydrogenated vegetable fats when you can buy the real real thing :D. And oh man, I nearly got suckered by some pseudo cream the other day, so glad I read the packaging. Coconut oil and something....This is not cream!!!!
    And you cannot make a real omelet with only egg whites, no matter how many recipes try to tell you that you can.

  2. Love your commentary on your grocery store trip...sad that things have to proclaim that they are 'real'...

    Awesome all the blooms. Thanks for playing with us at The Play Date Cafe!

  3. Your card is beautiful:):) Thanks for playing with us at the PDCC!!

  4. Well, now that I've walked with you, I'm going to snack, shower & stamp, in that order.
    Love the card!! LOVE the colors.

  5. ummm, i knew you entertained and educated me on Facebook, but why in the h-e-double-hockey sticks, have i not been spending time at your blog? some read the newspaper in the morning, but i think i should start reading your blog every morning. for reals yo.

  6. I'm heading to the store tonight so am looking forward to being a bit more observant, lol! Thanks for joining us at The Play Date Cafe this week - your card is a beauty!

  7. right on girl! You couldn't be more right. I saw something the other day that said "with real bacon". I guess the other alternative is bacos which is dried up corn starch with fake bacon flavor added.

  8. right on girl! You couldn't be more right. I saw something the other day that said "with real bacon". I guess the other alternative is bacos which is dried up corn starch with fake bacon flavor added.

  9. Lydia, you make me smile every day. It is so uplifting to read your thoughts on such a wide range of subjects. Today you provided extra 'cake' with your walking video. Thank you so much for sharing.

  10. Ha! They want us to THINK we're eating the REAL thing, even though it's made from oil and plastic (petroleum)... oh, that's oil, too. And then the labels are printed so tiny you need a magnifying glass to read it, while the guy behind you is getting in your space.

  11. Oh Lydia! You cracked me up with is post. What's even worse is when they put REAL or NATURAL on it and it ISN'T!!!! What a BIZARRE world we live in. I joined SCS a little more then a year ago and became a fan club member this spring but I never thought to follow your blog! Chatting on the DTGD threads had me looking up your blog and I am so glad I did!!! I will be a regular reader now. Your walk was great especially the stop at Starbucks!!!
    Your new follower, ohmypaper!

  12. Lydia, your card is STUNNING! I love everything! Thank you for playing with us at The Play Date Cafe!

  13. Your video is possessed. I strted it, then hit stop and it ... kept playing. I'm skeered.

    I totally agree with the "real" thing on food packaging. I guess if things are made with fruit juice, then it's a move up to be made with "real" fruit. I just buy the fruit and don't go down those other aisles.


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