Sunday, October 25, 2015

Why Water Is the Devil's Work

Okay - pre-post disclaimer:

If you are even slightly inclined to think or comment "we need the rain" or "I love rain" or "I sleep so great when it rains" - you need to stop reading this post right now - go fix yourself a beet salad with green bell peppers and Velveeta and read something by Henry James, because we will never come to agreement on this or anything else, and I still want us to be able to be friends. In spite of the fact that you like beets and green bell peppers and Velveeta and Henry James and rain.

Go on.

Okay - for those of you who remain - I have to tell you the revelation I had after I woke up in a dire panic at 4 AM to the sound of rain on Friday.

Well I actually didn't have the revelation at 4 AM.  All I had at 4 AM was anxiety and the sound of water hitting various objects in the back yard, a nervous cat, and my mental to do list.

I had the revelation at about 8 during my walk in the woods, after being awake for four hours unnecessarily.

I realized why water induces complete panic in me and all other normal people. (Here's the part where my parents start calling me to tell me I'm crazy. HANG ON I AM TYPING A BLOG POST.)

Let's go back to the cave days, when all our little amygdala reactions made sense and we weren't all numbed by yoga music, Angry Birds, Kardashians and the Kindle.

Let's say the cave version of me is sleeping in the cave and am suddenly awakened by water sounds. This can mean one of the following things is happening.

  • The cave is flooding. We live in a cave for God's sake. It's on the ground. If it fills up with water it's Poseidon adventure, but with larger foreheads and probably lots of rodents. 
  • Someone (I live with cave people, after all) is peeing in an unauthorized area. This is every woman's worst nightmare. You know I'm right. Every woman on earth is in a state of high alert, asleep or awake, for a peeing sound.
  • It's raining. My favorite Saber Toothed Tiger one shoulder throw is out on the grapevine, getting wet, and ensuring that I'll smell like a long dead goat for the rest of the year's social occasions.
  • Let's say I live in a barren desert cave community - the sound of water at night can only mean that the tiny amount of water that my dear husband Thag walked miles to bring us is spilling onto the sand and we're all going to die. 
  • We live near the ocean and suddenly a giant tsunami is consuming our world, and because we are cave people we didn't notice earlier in the day the ocean disappearing from view and all the animals fleeing for their lives. Now we are starting to be clued in, as the water starts to cover up our cave address pole, or whatever cave people had outside their caves.
The modern manifestation of these worries for me is this crazy terror that that the roof is just going to turn into cheesecloth, or all the pipes will burst. Rain is just terrible. And it's completely not my fault. It's just my cave self-preservation genes.

This is why you should walk every day. It really helps you solve mysteries in your everyday life and relax you after you've been terrorized at night by rain. Seriously!

I also saw deer prints - running deer prints - for nearly a mile. That was a much longer trot for me than the deer - his/her stride was about 10x mine. I think the rain was chasing him :).

I do really love - rain aside - being outside. Which I can't do when it rains. Yet another reason to support the normalcy of pluviophobia.

One thing I can do when it rains is stamp, though.

Kim's challenge for Hope You Can Cling To (we are giving away more than $5000 in crafty prizes, btw - are you playing? Still tons of time!) was to have use a transportation theme - representing all the requirements a cancer patient has to go to and from treatment, and what an important role these trips play. She's so creative.

I decided to do something that's been in my head for a while, born out of something I used in my latest online class featuring the Hearth & Home Thinlits. I combined my fave galaxy background I featured here with the Sleigh Ride Edgelits, with an extended cut from the window die. Then I created the Police Box header and flyer in Photoshop, glued them to my die cut, and then coated the whole thing with gloss medium.

I tried the windows in vellum and they just didn't look right, so I cut teeny pieces of Pacific Point cardstock to make the dividers and put them on Whisper White. I randomly sponged on Night of Navy on the Police Box to make it look a bit distressed. The sentiment is from my favorite Project Life Set - Let's Get Away.

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Let's Get Away - from rain. This weekend at my class - half the class couldn't make it because of flash flooding - and then halfway through class, my venue started filling with water!

It's always an adventure here, that's for sure.

Speaking of adventures - I have a new online class ready for you - holiday themed of course! You can read about that here, and catch up on any other classes you missed. 

AND - don't forget my mini-retreat in Dallas in November - we are close to capacity for this event! Reserve your seat today! The event runs from 10-3 on Friday before OnStage.


Built for Free Using: My Stampin Blog

I also have a new online class for you!

This one is featuring the Hearth & Home Framelits, Happy Scenes stamp set, as well as


  1. I love that you keep your sense of humor in these situations. I sincerely hope y'all are staying safe & dry. After having been thru the same situation here in Columbia, SC just a few weeks ago, I TOTALLY understand your dread of rain/water. But I do like to visit it at the ocean, WHERE IT BELONGS

  2. Stunning, stunning, stunning!

    It's raining here today and since I want us to stay friends, that's all I am going to say about that. :)

  3. Sending happy, dry thoughts to you and Thag! 😄

  4. Your card is beautifully colored and very unique. Good luck with the rain. We need some in the mid-Atlantic but not a deluge. Thanks for sharing your awesome card and your thoughts. I love your writing style.

  5. Amazing all the detail and that background is stunning.

  6. This is so cool! I love the background. i love how the Pacific point pops off...and the amazing details you added. Yeah, I wanted to do a Tardis, but even my dream version can't compete with this gem!

    Here's hoping your weather dries up. But not your creative juices. Keep those pouring in!

  7. Ohmygosh! This card is so awesome!! The latest season of Dr. Who is piling up on my DVR because I've been too busy lately to sit down and watch it. This card makes me REALLY want to make time for Dr. Who! {and I'll plead the 5th on my opinions of rain, except to say that I REALLY hate it when my dogs have muddy paws} ;)

  8. All things in moderation dear! I love rain and I work construction so it can be a little racey when we get liquid sunshine (trust me on this) but all in all, I love the smell when it is all done and how clean everything is when it finishes (except of course my truck....sigh). Remember, no rainbows without the rain!

  9. And of course, your color combo is wonderful! Just what the Doctor ordered!

  10. Please don't shun me, but I love rain, and I have never watched one Dr Who episode. But I DO pick you up at the airport, so I'm not a total loss.

  11. Oh, Lydia, I LOVE "Dr. Who," and this is amazing! You've really "built" his Tardis perfectly, and your background is so "Dr. Who" that it's amazing! I have to show my DH this one...he's a huge "Dr. Who" fan for many years! Hugs! (P. S. So, who's your favorite Doctor? Hehe!)


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