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Wednesday, November 19, 2008

You can take your Hypotenuse and ...

Look. This is an art blog. If you came here expecting me to be good at math, well - you really have some misdirected hope.

Let me sum up my theory about quite a few things actually. The stupider the words you use to describe what you do - the more likely you are to be covering up the fact that no one is going to be interested in whatever it is. Let me give you a few examples, and if you are still awake at the end of this list, you will be rewarded with a card for Kristina's Color Inspiration #31.

Hypotenuse.
Molality. (Interchangeable with Molarity)
Config.bat
Defragment.
Stochastic.

Good golly- I'm boring myself to death.

Why do I bring this up? Well, I have been doing a little editorial work lately for stamping, and one of the challenges of a Dawn McVey style perfect card is getting your elements perfectly straight on your work.

So tonight, prepping for the challenge, I thought I'd snap some pics of what I did with the little starbursts to line them up.

I lined the card up on my grid paper, and then laid this awesome triangular ruler I have had for like 4011 years down on my cardstock, lined up with one of the horizontal lines on the grid, to help me place my dealy-boppers straight on my card.

Well after I took the picture I was all - WTH ARE ALL THESE WIERD MARKINGS ON MY RULER??? WHO IN THE WORLD PUTS NUMBERS ON A RULER ALL CRAZY WITH 64 RIGHT NEXT TO 30?

This is clearly a stupid ruler and I bet there's a word for it - like a "Hypotenusish Heuristic/Stochastic Molality Model Calibration Device."

You know what I would call something like this? A TRIANGLE SHAPED STRAIGHT HELPY THING.

People everywhere would instantly know they wanted it.

Sheesh. Simplify, my people - SIMPLIFY.

And on that topic, as I've told you before - I really love Julie Ebersole's style - lots of clean white space and crisp images.

I feel like the colors in Kristina's challenges should take center stage - so really, I take an Iron Chef approach - let the secret ingredients shine. She always picks a harmonious combo - harder to do than it seems, so tonight I just let them be who they are!

I used a really fun two-step stamping leaf from an incentive stamp set called Perfect Match. (Do you know about incentive stamps? Stamps for 50 cents!!! Email me to learn more!) For the Elegant Eggplant, Pumpkin Pie and Close to Cocoa leaves, I stamped off once (twice for Eggplant)
before stamping the center of the leaves. The outlines are stamped with Basic Black, as is the greeting from Season of Thanks.

The little medallions they are on are punched out of matching cardstock with a Martha Stewart punch. They are adhered to a Whisper White card base with Snail, but the leaves are cut out and popped up with dimensionals.

So here is the full card. I hope you like it.

To answer a question about my webinar - the new Google Reader Webinar scheduled for December 2 is for those of you who missed the first one.

If you want to read what some of my attendees said, click here!

This seminar will teach you how to organize your favorite blogs and stamping projects for easy retrieval, without taking up one kilobyte (completely stupid word!!!) on your computer, and if your hard drive crashes - you'll still have all of it!!!

So check out this post and sign up for my December 2 Google Reader Webinar - it's live, interactive, and only $5!!

Now - do you want some words that AREN'T stupid? Some words that make you smile and feel all warm and fuzzy every time you hear them?

How about...

paw
purr
fur
nap
warm?



17 comments:

  1. LOL...that's actually a scale ruler used in drafting! I actually use one at work...the 1/64, 1/4, etc...are scales of 1". But, I can understand your confusion...it really doesn't make any sense. There are times that I even forget what side, or scale I was using and have to start all over! Have a great Thursday....

    ~M

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  2. Oh and BTW...the "fuzzy" words made me smile....:)

    ~M

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  3. Correction...they are scales of 1' not 1"...geez I'm such a nerd! :)

    ~M

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  4. Hey, my husband, who is a nuclear and marine engineer, has one of those straight helpy things! He also has lots of other cool tools that I steel every now and then for my stamping. For some reason he gets upset when I don't return them. Who would've guessed that nuclear engineering and stamping were a match?
    Jeannette

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  5. Oops, sorry forgot to say I love your card. Clean and simple are always chic.
    Jeannette

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  6. Yep! the "Triangle Straight Helpy Thing" is definitely an Architectural scale. I have several from when I used to be employed! Bummer! Adorable card, love the colors you used. I didn't like that MS punch when I first saw it, now its on my wish list. Cute. Kitties are so cute!

    Lisa

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  7. Your blog always makes me smile. glad the cats are back today too.

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  8. I went to a private school, and my dad was the principal, so we had to do all sorts of ridiculous things with protractors,(stupid word?), rulers, etc. The best thing he ever did to make up for that was in 7th grade when he filled in for our math teacher, and the classroom filled up with flies through an open door. He instantly said to pick up our fly swatters (rulers) and smack away. Best day in math ever!!!

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  9. Thanks to all your architectural people! I am a Math nerd, so I know hypotenuse, but none of the others AND I've NEVER seen one of those rulers before. Love the name TSHT although the acronym is not so nice looking. Love the colors on the card, and the kitties too. Thanks for making me laugh!!!

    loriwil@austin.rr.com

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  10. AWW OF PAW! It did bring an instant smile to my face!

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  11. Here's a word to make you smile - gnocchi!!!! I had some delicious ones this evening...in fact the second time this week! I'm out of town and in true separated at birth fashion, I dined at the same restaurant twice...just so I could have the gnocchi - mmmmmmmm. I thought of you at dinner wishing I had my camera so I could share. I do have one of those rulers too, mine is yellow and I can never measure correctly using it!! :-)

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  12. Hi, will you do another class in January - I'm just too busy before Christmas to take it - but I really want to. McLeslie@comcast.net

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  13. Ha ha, this post really cracked me up, and I so agree with you about all those fancy words!
    I saw your comment on Irene's blog about you also wanting your name to be Muffin. Yes, isn't it great? Of course it's not my real name (which is Eva by the way) but it's still nice. My niece (who just turned 18) started calling me Muffin when she was still very little, all because she couldn't say "moster" which means aunt or auntie. So anyway I've been called Muffin for the last 16 years or so. Perfect to use as a nick as well.
    Hope you have a great weekend!
    Oops, almost forgot - I love your card!

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  14. I love Julie Ebersole and Dawn McVey's style too. You did a great job with Kristina's challenge, Lydia. I love the leaves.

    Does Perfect Match have the purse outline and purse with polka dots? My SU demonstrator gave them to me last month.

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  15. I stop here for the humor as well as the talent and art

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  16. What? You never draw your room in 1/8" scale on graph paper, and then draw the new bookcase you want on a pink Post-it in 1/8" scale, and move it around in the room you drew? Are you serious? What about the dining room table and chairs? How did you know they would fit? Egads, you must really be flying by the seat of your hypotenuse

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  17. Your card is SO pretty, and I enjoyed reading your post!! Love the pics of your fuzzy friends !!

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