D is for....

Tomorrow might be normal, but today, I forgot to shut the guest bath door and Maddie took at least a partial dip in the toilet and then fell QUITE LOUDLY into the trash can. If I had not been laughing so hard at the way she looked in the trashcan (again) I might have had the presence of mind to take a pic. But alas, you will have to imagine it. Much as I will have to imagine how much toilet water she actually drank.

Speaking of toilets, today, someone who was unaware of toilets pooped in the elevator in the parking garage at work.

Well, if they didn't - I couldn't tell the difference. Please add this to the list of inappropriate elevator behaviors found in this post. So D is for DON'T DO ANYTHING GROSS IN THE ELEVATOR!

Am I the only person that thinks that Martha Stewart's best holiday is Halloween? Man, she comes up with some aamaaazing things this time of year. Run get her Halloween magazine if you haven't already. Totally makes me forgive her for not knowing what the FFA is on tonight's show. The Future Farmers of America, for any city folk in the audience, is an organization beloved in the communities of the Great Republic of Texas.

Speaking of Martha, I spent some of my used stamp sale money today to buy the cuuuutestttt Martha Punches!!! I blame Jenn for planting a subliminal Martha punch seed in my brain yesterday!

Anyway, tomorrow is my beautiful niece's birthday - she looks just like her stunning mom, my sister in law. I justified the punch because it makes SUCH a cute, girly birthday card.

It's a cupcake punch! It punches the frosting and the cup separately so it's easy to mix and match. I chose Pirouette Pink and Chocolate Chip. Looks good enough to eat!!

I added a self adhesive Rhinestone, a rubon from the spring mini I believe, (or maybe the Sell a Bration rubons - too lazy to go to the closet right now) in Chocolate Chip, and Pirouette Pink Ribbon. The card base is Sahara Sand. I know the base looks all brown in the closeup, but that's just because I took the card pic outside, with God's lighting, and the closeup inside, with inferior human lighting.

But look how cute the deckled top of that cupcake wrapper is!!!

And I'm not even going to tell you about the other punch I got, because you will Google its cuteness and spoil my surprise!! I know how you are!! You peekers. I'm onto you.

Anyway, I do actually have a tip for you tonight.

I wanted the pink ribbon to be both straight and to lay flat on my card.

Lately I have taken to putting SNAIL on the back of all of my ribbon because the self adhesive Martha ribbon I used on my TV show was so addictive, now I want everything to be all flat and perfect.

When you do this though you have to commit to straightness once and for all. The way I do make things straight (not a natural talent of mine) is the subject of an article I wrote that hopefully I will be able to show you in a magazine soon!!!

One trick is to use your grid on your Stampin Up! grid paper as a guide. Align the cardstock at a 90 degree angle somewhere on the paper. Then put your sticky ribbon inside the card, and align it on one of the verticals.

Just press the front of the card down onto the ribbon and voila - it's straight! Keep the card on the grid until you've stuck the ribbon on the front of the card down.

Easy.

So that's really the limit of my useful knowledge tonight!!

The next card is so simple, I can't really teach you anything.

Still on a Sahara Sand Kick, I stamped the image from Pocket Silhouettes on a scrap. I punched it with my 1.25" punch. I stamped it again (both in black) on Very Vanilla. I mounted the circle on the vanilla image with a dimensional, lining it up SUPER carefully. This is the beauty of circle punches with this technique, btw. Try this with a square, and drive yourself nuts!!! A circle is soooo forgiving!

Then I matted all that on black, and mounted it on a Vanilla card, with a Sahara Sand strip left over from the cutting fest for WCMD this weekend.

I added some black dots, the greeting, and I had myself about a 3.5 minute card.

Hope you enjoy these.

Don't worry about the stock market. We'll come back from this. :)

PS - Hey - if you're seeing this in an email subscription or a reader, click over to the blog to check my sidebar for my new T-shirts - They are quite hilarious if I do say so myself!!

The first one is for all the people who touch me in the grocery store and engage in inappropriate elevator behaviors!

The second one is for all my glamorous and beautiful readers!! :)