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Sunday, November 11, 2007

Martha, why must you take all my money?

I love Martha Stewart. Unapologetic adoration. However, now that she has a craft line, I find her stealing more of my money at every turn!!! Here's how a typical day of Martha reaching into my pockets goes. Stand by for a virtual ADD experience, because you're going to get to be me for a bit. I get up, go to the gym (wow - love Lifetime Fitness) which normally prepares me for a somewhat full day, filling me with pep and confidence. Come home, clean the house, blog hop, etc. Decide I'm going to make my Thanksgiving office treats today since the sales meeting is this week, consuming my soul like a Dementor would... I base them on Vicky Maduzia's crazy cute treats on SCS (pause in the action for blog hopping and eating leftover mac & cheese) but of course, mine have to be blue. I shun the fall colors for my comfort zone. Well then I realize that all my Dove Chocolates are at the office. (pause when I realize I have grapefruit flavored LaCroix fizzy water in the fridge.. mmm). So, I gotta go to Walgreens and get some milk chocolate Doves, which come in blue foil. More ADD when I realize I need a new craft knife because I've watched Kristina Werner's video on monogram embossing and I MUST DO THIS IMMEDIATELY OR I WILL NO LONGER HAVE ADD. Wander around Walgreen's cursing their lack of a craft section. Give up and get the Doves, which - YIPEE - have a new sassy blue & gold foil for the holidays. Mentally revise the design of my treat. Ooh - I like that eyeshadow. Grabbed it. Focus myself, check out, head to Michael's for the craft knife. Seriously - mine is a total P.O.S. - this was necessary. ADD myself into a petting festival with the puppies for adoption at Petco. Feel like stealing the big German Shepherd. Restrain. Go into Michael's, where I'm ASSAULTED BY MARTHA!! LOOK WHAT HAPPENED!!! AT LEAST SHE HAS A CRAFT KNIFE, SO I CAN TELL MYSELF MY MISSION WAS ACCOMPLISHED!! Home, whereupon I "investigated" the Dove wrappers to see if there were new messages for the holidays - THERE ARE!!! By investigate, I mean eat about 100 of them, cancelling out the gym and making me chase my tail a bit. Then I actually started working on the treats, which I think turned out pretty cute. I dig blue & gold. Experimented with ribbon etc until I found something that wasn't too gaudy. More ADD diversion helping my sister add a link to her blog, researching needle felting, looking at the AOL headlines, worrying about work... Now what the heck am I going to do with all these little punched out scallops? I feel a little Forrest Gump riff coming on - lemon scallops, coconut scallops, fried scallops, scallops scampi..

Okay, a little more worrying about work and then a Corona to settle myself down. Wasn't it Ben Franklin who said something about beer being proof that God loves us? I think I would have liked that man.

Back to Kristina Werner. If you haven't checked out her video tutorials, please do. Simple, fast techniques explained brilliantly. Very generous of her to post, really. Sounds like she's a busy lady. Speaking of busy ladies..
I'm going to get my busy you know what back to finishing my treats so that I can post a cute idea I stumbled across while making them.. No way in Hades I could indulge my ADD and make it now and post it because I have like two square inches of workspace left until I finish these. Here's what the inside looks like. I hope they like them!!!

2 comments:

  1. Love the blue and gold. you did a stunning job!!! What are the Michael's contents? punches and...liquid pearls? I am curious!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. oh girly, you make me smile! i can just imagine you walking around the different stores getting distracted by all the wonderful stuff--especially the DOVE chocolates. i'm wondering what pretty wrap the dark ones have for the holidays...

    cute project...too bad you don't know anyone who celebrates Hanukkah! they'd be perfect for that...

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