Thursday, January 7, 2016

If Craft Products Were Sold by Big Pharma

You know I have a pet peeve about drug ads. I really miss the days when you and your medical conditions were discussed out of my earshot in your doctor's office.

I don't need to hear a long list of someone's embarassing fungal symptoms while I'm just trying to watch The Middle and have a pizza.

I also do not need to hear what is going to happen to the fungal victim should they try to seek treatment with this company's drug - the results of which are FAR worse than the fungus. The drug causes cancer, blindness, eyeball rupture and club feet - but it does WONDERS on the fungus. There's always 10 seconds of positive and 20 seconds of side effects.

Then three months later, you start seeing the class action lawsuit ads for the drug.

They should just combine them. 10 seconds of yay - your fungus will be gone, 10 seconds of Stephen King level  side effects, and 10 seconds of class action information sponsored by Dewey, Cheatham & Howe.

It's to the point now where I'm actually starting to think that all the big drug companies are just fronts for law firms. Pretty good idea, if you think about it.

I was wondering what would happen if craft products were forced to be marketed the same way.

Ads for the latest stamp & die bundle might go like this.

In an excited voice, a woman who sounds like a cross between Martha Stewart and Gwen Stefani says: "WAIT until you see the new Fuzzy Bunny stamp and die bundle - it's going to change your crafting life forever. Stamp little bunnies and cut them out in seconds, enlivening your spring crafting projects, bringing you inner peace and making you skinnier."

And then, at 10x speed in a voice more like Voldemort's, she says "Use of this stamp and die bundle may lead to stained hands, clothing and carpet. Dies may get lost or stuck to the back of your MISTI for months, causing you extreme anxiety. You may be accused of hoarding. You may BE hoarding. You may buy a brand new storage system based on this product alone. This may lead to you taking over the family dining room. You may scream at family members until you find your bunny die. You may experience feelings of wantmonster over other unbought bunnies. Say goodbye to the top of your desk for a few months. Craft Corp is not responsible for the hours spent on Pinterest looking for ideas for this bundle. You will see videos by Jennifer McGuire with other bunnies, neglect your bunnies and buy more bunnies. You may forget to bathe or feed people while playing with bunnies. You may buy six new packages of pink cardstock trying to find the perfect match. Bunnies may lead to the purchase of 400 Copic markers and refills. You may accidentally drink watercolor water while Instagramming your bunnies. If you feel you have been harmed by Craft Corp's bunnies, you may be entitled to compensation - contact Dewey, Cheatham & Howe today.

Today I'm the guest at the Fusion Card Challenge blog, thanks to my friend Stef, and this was our inspiration piece:


I KNEW what I was going to use the second I saw it.

First, I took the Brights Pattern pack and cut various width strips - I didn't measure - just random. I flipped some upside down to make the chevron pattern - I think I saw this first from Brian King.

Then I adhered them to a white card base, and cut an opening with my Ovals framelits, and stamped the sentiment from Enjoy the Little Things on the inside of the card.

Then I cut two roses with the Rose Garden Thinlits - one white and one Melon Mambo. I covered the back of the Melon Mambo outline with tape, and pieced the white pieces back into the outline and attached it to the card. The sequins are from the Watercolor Wishes kit - they are my fave sequins - so iridescent and pretty.

Pin It
Built for Free Using: My Stampin Blog

Thanks for a fun challenge Stef!

I'm off to CHA so I'll be peeking things soon on my other channels.

Loveyameanitbye.


39 comments:

  1. Absolutely stunning card ... thanks again for joining me.

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  2. SOOOO much truth in this post regarding the drug ads. Might as well deal with my headache by cutting off my head!
    And I kinda snorted about accidentally sipping watercolor water. NOT that I've ever done that-came close tho.
    Gorgeous card. That color combo is one of my top 3 favorites ever.
    Safe travels. Can't wait to see all the goodies at CHA.

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  3. Man I hate those commercials too.......but I love your bright card!

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  4. SNORT! I'm feeling the need to go look for a fuzzy bunny set... :) ~ Tricia

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  5. What fun, upbeat colors and so perfect for the sketch! Your posts always make me smile, not just your card, but your fabulous and funny, Erma Bombeck writing style. Thanks for the laughs!

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  6. Love the chevron background. Awesome job!

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  7. I don't like the drug adds. In The Netherlands it's forbidden to show them on TV and in magazines.There are only 2! countries in the world that show adds on TV, New Zealand and the USA.
    Love your take on the adds. So funny!
    And I love your card.

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  8. I was so glad I had put down my coffee before I read the story... ( love it ) the random chevron's are really cool on this design. :)
    funny true story... I got a new bunny dies in the mail on monday...

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  9. The drugs ads are a pet peeve of mine as well. Just think how much more affordable medicines would be if all that money wasn't spent on advertising. Beautiful card, love the flower peeking over the edge of the oval. Have a great time at CHA!

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  10. Nice card, but Where Are The BUNNIES!?!? I Was Expecting Bunnies!!

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  11. Great to have you as our Guest and love your bright card, fabulous and vibrant x

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  12. What a cool card! I so agree about drug ads. It is the same side effects for every med. Just drives me crazy.

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  13. Laughing out loud about the add. Your card is delightful bold and vibrant design!

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  14. Your commentary is so true and made me laugh out loud! I see LOOONG ads in magazines for drugs and then two pages of things that could go wrong - why bother?? The craft stuff...so very true! :-) Your card is charming and bright and happy - thanks so much!

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  15. Fantastic card. Love those bold and bright chevrons for the background. Love the way you've cut the different sized strips and flipped them.

    I'm with you about the drug ads. There always seems to be people walking on the beach ... such a peaceful scene as a distraction, while the commentator lists the huge amounts of side-effects (all done on fast speed hoping that we will miss it). If everyone really listened to what would happen if they took that drug, none would be sold.

    I really enjoyed the crafting version. So funny!! I could just picture all those things you talked about, especially drinking the watercolour water. :) I think I have actually done that! :) xx

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  16. I can relate to some of those side effects so maybe I should seek help? Nah! :) Fabulous card - love the background! So happy to have you as GD over at Fusion.

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  17. What a bright cheerful card, love it! Thank you for sharing your humor on the craft stuff with us, I needed a good laugh today! I'm with you on the drug ads.

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  18. I was drinking a glass of water when I read the sentence about watercolour water. I laughed so much, water came out my nose.

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  19. such a fun card and love the sentiment! So glad you could join us as a Fusion Guest!

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  20. Love to read your musings. So glad I happened upon your blog.

    Awesome card... Thanks for the challenge.

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  21. I love spending time with you each day - after reading this, I feel like I just chatted with you about these pharma commercials. :) Love this cheery card (and love that I saw my name in there). Also love you.

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  22. Amen on the drug ads. They should be banned. Now the craft ad, that did give me a laugh because it's so true and we crafters easily laugh at ourselves!

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  23. You are so right about the drug ads. They drive me CRAZY!

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  24. ....or, if your lucky, you'll produce a card like this and be cured of every ailment under the sun. Laughed my "you know what" off when I read your side effects (mostly, because all of the above are so true). The card is, indeed, lovely.

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  25. Oh my goodness, you are soooo funny! "Dewey, Cheatham & Howe"....hilarious! The side effects had me rolling. We have been without tv for three years (we just enjoyed Netflix--no commercials) Now if I want to watch (as my daughter calls it) sappy Christmas movies on Hallmark I am overwhelmed with commercials that make me think I have a dire ailment! Sometimes I miss the good old days when we just had pain, sucked it up and no one expected to live ailment free to 103!
    Your card is gorgeous! You are a bit of a genius with those chevrons! I am posting my card to the Fusion challenge tomorrow!
    Have a wonderful time at CHA!

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  26. What great bold colors on this Lydia! thanks so much for helping us celebrate Fusions 2nd anniversary by being a guest DT! Julia xx

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  27. OK, you had me laughing out loud.. "You may accidentally drink watercolor water while Instagramming your bunnies. " LOL! And your card is fabulous by the way! :-)

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  28. oh, that was funny...and, I could audition for the crafter marketer ad for the part where it takes over my life. ;) Thanks for the chuckle.

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  29. I need to check the back of my Misti......

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  30. Love your "craft ad". Thanks for sending us a smile.

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  31. Thanks for the LOL post - I needed it! LOVE the card, as well!

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  32. So true about the drug commercials and a few others that don't need to be on there that are so embarrassing to have to watch. I love your card very much.

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  33. OMGoodness, Lydia, I came to your blog from Diane Zechman and since I had just grabbed a cup o' java, I've just spent the best 30 minutes of non-crafting time. I laughed so hard that my son came to see what it was all about, thinking, I'm sure that I had lost my marbles. Your cards are vibrant and happy and you have a gift of putting into words what most of us feel. Thank you so much for a very pleasant 30 + minutes. I'm your newest follower, so I will definitely be back again. Have a great evening!
    Lena

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  34. OMG - we could be best friends! Your post was SOOOOO funny and SOOOOO my humor - I could actually hear that "guy announcer" voice - Personally, I think humor and crafting go together like toenails & fungus (see what I did there?) - LOL - I hope you are enjoying CHA - yes that is jealousy dripping from my voice. HUGS! Christi

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  35. Love your fabulous vibrant card Lydia and seriously LOL!!! So glad you joined in the fun as a super special guest to celebrate FUSION 2nd Anniversary!

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  36. OMG! I had to leave a comment because you almost had me crying here with your commercial for the bunny bundle! I must admit I am a crafter that jumps from blog to blog checking out the beautiful inspiration. BUT you have slowed me down, and I am actually reading your blog! (Imagine that?)
    Thanks for the information, the laughs AND the inspiration! Glad I found your blog!

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