I'm not famous enough to get interviewed by anyone else, so I thought I'd just interview myself today.
It's going to be a sort of Seinfeld style interview - wandering all over and sort of about nothing.
So here goes:
ME: So, thank you for joining me today. I'd like to give our readers something to argue about. What controversial statement would you like to get off your chest?
me: So many to choose from, so little time. I guess I'll have to go with how revolting I find Nutella to be. And green bell peppers. And beets. And Nancy Grace.
ME: Well that should keep them busy for a while. Now - let's get down to business. To what do you owe your mad procrastinating skills?
me: I'm going to go ahead and go with being raised by a math professor. Math professors, like Spanish authors, do not have a linear sense of time. On my mother's side of the family there were all these type A deadline focused people, like my grandfather, king of awesome, but clearly the math professor genes won that battle. I'd like to point out that I'm far more efficient than most people, because, since I procrastinate, I get things done in about 1/10th the amount of time that those freaky planner people do.
ME: I did notice that you didn't answer any of my emails until the day before this interview.
me: Yep. But I'm here, right? Game, set, match - ME. Booya!
ME: If you say so. What advice would you give yourself if you were able to talk to yourself at age 6?
me: Well first I'd probably scream and scare myself, because that would be hilarious. But then, I'd tell myself to quit Girl Scouts before the whole "camping" trip because there are no bathrooms - just boxes of poop in the woods, and there ain't NO badge shiny enough for THAT.
ME: Well played. Okay - cats or dogs?
ME: Got it. What is responsible for the current ruinous state of our culture in America?
me: Besides Nutella? Hang on. Okay - plastic surgery. Oh - and fake cheese.
ME: What technology - besides flying cars - are we long overdue for?
me: Nano butlers. Nano butlers whose mad cleaning energy charges your cell phone. Yes. That.
ME: Who would you like your next interview to be with?
me: Duh. Grumpy Cat.
ME: Thank you for your time.
me: Thank me for my time.
Speaking of thanking people for things, I need to thank my sweet friend MariLynn DeGroot for sending me the most STUNNING bag of quilled flowers. I about fell out of my chair when I got it. They are so perfect and beautiful and I have HUNDREDS of them. I can't even imagine how long it took her to make them, so they are such a sweet, handmade blessing.
I knew I needed a super spectacular setting for them, so I whipped out my All Dressed Up Framelits and made a pretty floral dress - BOOM!
Tea For Two.
Now I'm off to see where they are on the nano butlers.
I hope you have a good night. Please don't eat fake cheese or Nutella.