Yours truly had a quite pooptacular experience with a Southwest Airlines crew member (off duty) on my marathon trek back from Chicago last week. The crew that worked all THREE of my flights that day were angels, as per usual, and got me to my destination safely and on time, without charging me 80 squillion dollars for my bags. I love Southwest Airlines.
But this story must be told.I changed my flight, as I was dying to get home a little earlier after two weeks on the road. My bags made it onto an early afternoon flight on standby, but I, tragically, did not. I waited for the 4:30 to Kansas city. The flight is oversold. The last empty seat is the middle seat in my row. The crew was waiting for an off duty crew member for that last seat. She was late.
She walks onto the plane, and my heart sinks. This person coming to sit in the last four square inches is holding my worst pet peeve in her late hands. A giant bag of stinky McDonald's grub from the airport that I will now be forced to smell. Just what I needed - the stench of a McRib or a Filet of Fish and the sounds of someone eating one micron away from my face.
Oh, but it gets better. She has two giant carry ons. She just sits down, shoves one under the seat and starts moving MY purse under the seat in front of me. I barked at her, and she leaves this giant thing on her lap, sensing through her insensitivity that I might be a woman on the edge of something quite memorable. We have pushed back. An anxious steward comes by and tells her she needs to stow it. She doesn't care. She says - "I don't have anywhere to put it." He says - "we've already pushed back - the bins are full." She says "WELL I'M NOT GOING TO CHECK IT. IT'S FULL OF FOOD". Of course it is. Probably crawdads. He sighs and takes it from her off to the back somewhere.
It gets better.Immediately following takeoff, she reaches THROUGH MY FACE to grab that same steward's arm as he sprints towards the front of the plane. She says "Hey - that bag y'all took from me (what? excuse me?) - that has my headphones in it. Will you bring me my headphones?" I just flat out stared at her with my mouth open, hoping for the steward's suggestions about places she could have put her headphones prior to take off. I was prepared with my own list of places. Sadly, those didn't come. Shockingly, he goes and gets them. I realize that people have forgotten the fine art of devastating, colorfully worded attitude adjustments.
An hour of McRib smell later, we are about to land in Kansas. We are not changing planes, so they tell us to stay in our seats until they count us and then we can move. I'm coiled like a big cat in the jungle ready to spring across thirty rows of seats to get away from this insane person when she stands up and says "I'm gonna move." I look at her, sleep deprived me, with my sore feet and my sore throat, and I said....
"Not as fast as I am, lady."
You, with your cooler full of God knows what and your bag of offensive and your headphones - you, are in the dog house.
Anyway - how about those prizes I promised? You guys had some fabulous books!!
Instead of one prize, since I'm so late, I'll choose three!! I have one of the adorable tote bags from convention, your choice of pattern, one collapsible trashcan for your stamp camps or desk, and the Vintage Wallpaper Embossing Folder.
It's first come first serve for my responders - if you're first, you choose your prize first! If no one claims by Friday, I'll choose again :)
My friends at random.org tells me my winners are:
1colincary, Laurie Ludwig and Beedubya!
Thanks for all the book ideas! Off to enter them in my Amazon Wish List! Loveyameanitbye.
OH - and don't forget - my CHA pics are on the Understand Blue Facebook Page and the Splitcoaststampers Facebook Page - you do NOT have to be a member of Facebook to see them!
Have you signed up for the UBlue Cyber Club? Attended one of my Webinars?? Come on - get your geek on! :) Want to see my other blog?